I want Washington to slap another franchise tag on Kirk Cousins.
Because the franchise isn’t quite big enough as a laughingstock and trying to recoup value on this fiasco provides room to grow.
Because Dan Snyder and Bruce Allen don’t yet look as foolish as possible, despite what appears to be their best efforts.
Because attempting to trade Cousins after using two franchise tags on him and acquiring Alex Smith would prove how much they don’t get it.
Because we’d get a peek into their parallel universe, where management views itself as competent but all we see is cluelessness.
Because we believe they can sink further and faster in their race to the bottom – being smaller, meaner, pettier – with less class than ever.
Because watching the move blow up is the best entertainment we can expect, considering their difficulty in producing a consistent winner.
Because they’d need Cousins’ cooperation to pull off a tag-and-trade, and asking for goodwill at this point would be comical.
Because there’s still a chance for a sliver of credibility with Smith after their quarterback quagmire, and goodness knows they don’t deserve it.
I can’t imagine Washington using the franchise tag on Cousins for the third time. But that doesn’t matter. Allen reportedly has considered the maneuver.
Public discussion of that contemplation is good/bad enough.
What is he thinking?
The Skins immediately would be on the hook for $34.5 million until Cousins signs the tag. He could take his sweet time, hindering Washington’s ability to sign free agents prior to the NFL draft in April. He also could refuse to sign a long-term deal with Allen’s potential trade partners, who’d be reluctant to swing a deal without that guarantee.
Cousins’ willingness to bet on himself will go down as one of the smartest wagers in NFL history. Now that he’s on the brink of free agency, set to test the open market like no in-his-prime-QB before him, the Skins should let this saga end as both parties move on.
A proper organization wouldn’t insert itself into the process, complicating matters for Cousins and his would-be suitors, trying to extract more than a 2019 third-round pick for his departure.
The right thing to do is simple.
Issue a graceful statement when the Smith trade becomes official. Express regret that things didn’t work out with Cousins. Thank him for his time in D.C. Wish him well in the future. Assure fans that you’re committed to building a championship contender.
But we’d be unable to mock as much if the Skins were sensible, and where’s the fun in that?
So, yes, please tag Cousins again.
Laughter is the only thing that keeps us from crying.