By Brian Tinsman

WASHINGTON — No matter how entertaining the NFC Championship game ends up being on Sunday night, it pales in comparison to insanity happening in the stands, the tailgate lot, and the pandemonium expected downtown after the game.

It started early on Sunday, with Philadelphia public servants spending time and tax dollars spreading Crisco on every light pole and USPS mailbox in town. Seriously. The slime coating is intended to protect Eagles fans (and city property) who are inclined to climb on top of things after exciting games:

Around the same time, in a decision that cannot be properly defended, the parking lots opened near Lincoln Financial Field. That’s right, at 8 a.m., nearly 11 hours before kickoff, the first round of tailgate lots opened at FDR Park.

Lots continued to open, at 11:30 a.m., 1 p.m. and finally those closest to the stadium opening at 3 p.m.

Between 11:30 a.m. and approximately 3 p.m., fans in the M lots got drunk and rowdy enough to start a giant brawl that left some fans bloody and headed for the drunk tank. Police mounted on horseback had to remove fans in order to restore order.

The best part: this fight was among Eagles fans.

As was this one (Viewer discretion is advised for strong language):


It wasn’t until later in the pregame process that Eagles fans remembered who they were here to hate: Minnesota Vikings fans. Given that there is no rivalry between the two teams, it’s unclear if Vikings fans were prepared for the type of reception that they received in Philly.

Fans of other teams in the NFC East know what it’s like to watch a team in Philly, and the advice is pretty standard: don’t wear your team’s apparel and keep your head down. These Vikings fans did not get that advice (Viewer discretion is advised for strong language):

Finally, for the sake of all things holy, the game got started. That means that even the most insufferable Eagles fan now has something to direct his rage into, right? Well, not exactly–not when antagonizing Vikings fans is still an option:

Given the Eagles’ substantial second-half lead, it looks like the carnage could continue until late into the night in Philly. Concerned Philadelphia property owners should break out the Crisco.


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