Lurch unleashed an epic rant on The Junkies Monday morning, after his record picking college football games this season slid to 8-22 over the weekend.
Jason ‘Lurch’ Bishop of the Sports Junkies was letting his dog roam free at a dog park in Leesburg Friday, when he says he was introduced to the “awful little white, scruffy little oversized rat dog” belonging to Redskins QB Kirk Cousins.
With the Junkies broadcasting from Quicken Loans National, Lurch took a spot overlooking the 10th hole to hilariously call Tiger Woods’ tee shot in a low, “golf tone.”
In a series of updates which have gone overlooked, Lurch is considering training his dog in German, and has been begging for free dog crates because he’s nubbity nubbs.
Surely by now you’ve heard there’s some controversy about town. Should Lurch let his dog pee in his neighbors’ yard?
Lurch’s new dog has already proven to have a flare for heroics, helping him thwart the home invasion of a house mouse recently.
Lurch has officially adopted the Dutch Shepard he fell in love with on the air last week, which he met when the Washington Animal Rescue League brought a few pups in need of a home into the Junkies studio, renaming the pooch ‘Luca.’
The journey of Lurch welcoming a dog into the Poppa family has been an evolving one, dating back to July 2013, and one which may have finally reached its blissful conclusion Wednesday, thanks to the Washington Animal Rescue League (warl.org).
Perhaps being ‘worried’ about it isn’t the proper phrasing, but Lurch is certainly ‘aware’ he’s becoming the crazy, screaming dad who ruins his children’s softball games for all other parents and kids in attendance, he admitted Monday.
Lurch stopped the room with a notable Big Time at the start of the show on Thursday, when he revealed that he has 20-foot ceilings in the master BEDROOM of his palatial Ashburn estate.