Who Could Hate Free Fireworks? These People

WASHINGTON — Just one week removed from America’s birthday, we are officially in the prime stretch of fireworks season in the U.S.

Fireworks are beautiful explosions that connect the primal urge to blow things up with the carefree spirit of summer nights. They are also the perfect plus-one for beer, beaches, baseball and barbecues.

To be fair, not everyone likes fireworks. Combat veterans and pets are two groups that have well-documented issues with fireworks, but almost everyone else enjoys a free fireworks show, right?

Apparently not D.C. residents near Nationals Park at 10:15 p.m. on a Wednesday night.

Closed to the public during the MLB All-Star break, the team held a private event last night at Nats Park and put out this tweet at 9:35 p.m.:

The seemingly innocuous heads-up tweet got 29 responses, almost universally negative, full of angry emojis, caps lock and (probably empty) threats.

Here’s a look back at the best responses, sorted into categories:

Caps Lock

No matter how far society progresses, it always comes back to “caps lock” to let people know it’s serious. Lower case letters are just so passive:

Brevity:

Needs no explanation:

Idle Threats

Maybe these people followed up on these threats. But even if they did, these governing bodies don’t care:

Whodunit

D.C. is one of the biggest media markets in the world, which means that there is a high concentration of professional (and aspiring) investigative journalists. Not all heroes wear capes:

Salty Sarcasm

Sarcasm is the backbone of the Internet, so there should be no surprise that fun was had at the @Nationals’ expense:

Actually Happy

Hey, who said free fireworks are all bad? At least these guys enjoyed it:

 

Of course, there’s a time and a place for all things, fireworks included. No one wants to wake up to the sound of explosions without context, and the Nationals could probably be more proactive in warning the neighborhood.

But it is funny to see free fireworks, which bring joy to so many, inspire such venom on Twitter.

 

Follow Brian Tinsman and 106.7 The Fan on Twitter.

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