Chris 'Blue Shorts' Lingebach

WASHINGTON (CBSDC) — Bob Saget made a masterful call-in to the Junkies Thursday morning, now let’s all take a moment to bask in some of the timely quips with which he remarked.

As an admirer of radio and comedy, sometimes I can’t help but fawn over someone who needs not a second, not even a split second, but senses a comedic opening as the person he’s reacting to begins to form his sentence.

For comedians – the best comedians – this timing is honed and crafted, then reduced over the course of hours upon hours in the comedy clubs, like a Cy Young pitcher’s ERA over the duration of a Major League season.

The space needed to fill that silent void is uniquely narrow for someone who’s labored over that honing process, not over the course of one devoted summer, but in the stretch of his or her entire life.

Saget possesses that rare timing, which, understanding and appreciating the intensive process required to attain it, I am in awe.

Take this clip from his Junkies hit, for example:

Lurch: I assume you live in LA.

Saget: Yea, I do. You want the exact address? You guys want to come over?

Lurch: I can probably just figure it out on Google.

Saget: It is pretty upsetting, isn’t it?

Lurch: But have you come to kind of rooting for the Kings out there?

Saget: I have to. I mean, I have come to. I don’t know how to do that sentence and not get in trouble somehow.

It’s the type of timing that can get a girl’s pants off – not merely because she finds her aggressor humorous, but because she cannot even comprehend why she’s laughing; she’s overcome by the forward thinking, rendered befuddled as she tries to place both what triggered the joke and when.

There’s many avenues from whence such timing can surface, another being in the smooth delivery of a canned response.

I think we all can admit – if you’ve ever had to deal with a landlord blasting through your front door, slinging the same lousy joke from his side pocket at the 1st of every God-forsaken month, as I have – that recycled material, in the wrong hands, can be deadly embarrassing for all parties involved.

But, used the right way and armed with the appropriate ration of timing, pre-planned material, with the added measure of foresight from its issuer, has the ability to hit the receiving party in waves.

Case in point: as Saget was talking about his California home and dead birds, and traffic, or whatever other elements small talk necessitates, he slipped this little gem in at the end, which took Lurch like three words into his next question to process.

“I like my life. I have a good quality of life. I live alone.”

Sleight of hand is about as important to joke delivery as the suction to my mother’s breast pump device.

That is to say, without it, you’re going hungry that day.

Asked to describe his party stage in life, Saget — who, to this day, can still shock an audience more familiar with his iconic fatherly role on “Full House” than his style of humor – exercised that element of surprise without flaw.

“You don’t want to be my age; you don’t want to be in your 50s and be hanging out in bars with 20-year-old girls – I’ve got three daughters, it’s just enough already, you know? So I still go. And I’ve gotten four of them pregnant, but it’s really not a big deal. I take care of ‘em. I’ve got a couple guest houses.”

For all these reasons, I’ve already purchased my tickets (was given them for free) to see Bob’s Friday, June 20 show at the Warner Theatre, and you should too.


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