by Chris 'Blue Shorts' Lingebach

WASHINGTON (CBSDC) — California Chrome has generated a steady stream of news after winning the Preakness Stakes over the weekend, most notably after it was announced Monday the Triple Crown hopeful will be allowed to wear the nasal strip in the Belmont Stakes he’s worn in his previous two victories.

But there’s something larger at play here.

Multiple photos surfaced on Twitter prior to the Preakness Stakes illustrating Chrome’s heightened level of excitement.

(NSFW Warning: You can view them here and here.)

The Junkies, an aptly titled radio show in this instance, were overpowered by Chrome’s physical prowess bright and early Monday morning.

“I’m sorry, I can’t stop looking at the picture of California Chrome,” EB said.

“I know it entertains you and Valdez,” Lurch said. “It just doesn’t entertain me.” 

“Jason, it’s the biggest thing you’ve ever seen,” EB said. “Did it run the race that way?”

“I’m not shocked that the horse has a big dong,” Lurch said.

EB’s obsession over others’ junk size has long penetrated discussion on the show. Sometimes, he’s even wondered aloud what it would be like to possess detachable junk, which curiously transforms into PlayDoh.

But to my knowledge, these conversations have never transcended the human element, and crossed over into obsession of an animal’s package.

Maybe they have. Now there’s just tangible, sizable evidence to lick their lips about.

“I think now this is the new standard; California Chrome has to be cised before every race,” EB accurately noted.

“Maybe they can find some horse porn to show him before Belmont,” Cakes said.

“Maybe he got cised for Baltimore,” JP said.

“They need some sort of, what do they call those people that they have?” EB questioned.

“Fluffer,” Cakes replied.

“They need a fluffer for California Chrome,” EB said. “Clearly this is the recipe for success.”

If you find yourself pulling for California Chrome to become horse racing’s first Triple Crown winner since Affirmed won the Kentucky Derby, Preakness Stakes and Belmont Stakes consecutively in 1978, then you better be pulling for him to be noticeably cised on June 7.

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