Jason’s Disgusting, Gnarled Socks He Claims Are New (Photo)

by Chris 'Blue Shorts' Lingebach
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Heres Lurchs nubbs filthy socks hes wearing.(Credit: @Matt_Valdez)

Heres Lurchs nubbs filthy socks hes wearing.(Credit: @Matt_Valdez)

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WASHINGTON (CBSDC) – Lurch claims the disgusting, gnarled pair of socks he was wearing Friday were already disgusting and gnarled upon recent purchase.

Let’s investigate.

Valdez: Jason’s also wearing brown socks. They’re not supposed to be brown.

EB: There’s been a lot of joaning on your socks.

Lurch: What, you mean on Twitter?

EB: No, just around here. Behind your back.

Lurch: Do you know how stupid Valdez is? He thinks that they’re brown because they’re dirty.

EB: Let me see. Let me see. Why? That’s how you bought ’em?

Lurch: Yea, they’re beige socks.

Valdez: They’re not beige.

Cakes: I believe him because he’s a foofy golfer.

Lurch: That’s the color. They’re not dirty!

EB: They do look dirty. I’m just gonna say they do look dirty.

Lurch: You guys are so dumb!

Valdez: It looks dirtier than the Chesapeake Bay!

Lurch: That’s the way they were when I bought ’em new, Rickshop.

I’m just gonna ask the obvious question here:


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