by Chris 'Blue Shorts' Lingebach

WASHINGTON (CBSDC) – An alleged text exchange between Justin Bieber and hot Selena Gomez featuring racy, blacked out junk photos and a plea from Gomez for Bieber to enter rehab was the lead story on EB’s Entertainment Page Tuesday morning.

The exchange — which begins with Bieber thickly laying on the ‘I love you’ spiel, quickly combated by Gomez calling him a drug addict (playing the role of a scorned lover who’s tired of his act) – whether real or fake, certainly fits a believable narrative.

EB really rose to the occasion on delivering some theater of the mind in choosing to read the texts over the air, playing both rolls, and breathing a little animation into them.

[H/T @Ebjunkies]

“Baby come on. I love you,” he read in his raspy, seductive (gross) voice.

“I don’t buy that bull[POOP] anymore, I was honest with you, and I gave you a second chance,” EB said, in a voice that shockingly sounds a lot like Gomez in real life(not at all). “All my friends were right. You’re such an [*grabs tip of tongue* APPLE].

There’s plenty more. I mean, this seriously goes on for a solid two minutes, which you can hear in the trimmed-down audio clip ABOVE. Do you really not have two minutes to feel better about yourself?

Also, follow along with the original text exchange from Radar Online here, which will open in a new window.


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