Spring Training: Denard Span’s Crippling Fear of Fish, Birds

by Blue Shorts
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VIERA, Fla. (CBSDC) - A football player can get drilled in the open field by a 300-pound lineman and get back up.

A hockey player can take a puck straight to the jaw and finish the game.

A professional baseball player can stare down a pitcher capable of pelting him with a 100-mph fastball.

But straight out of the land of the NFL’s Eric Berry and his irrational fear of horses, comes new Washington Nationals center fielder Denard Span, who is terrified of … birds and fish?

Check out this conversation Span had with the Junkies, when he stopped by their Spring Training studio at Space Coast Stadium in Viera:

“Didn’t we see an interview where Denard has admitted – I don’t want to say this to insult him but – he’s afraid of everything?!” Eric Bickel of the Junkies asked Span on Wednesday.

“Awww … come on,” Span laughed. “I’m not afraid of you.”

“That stemmed from the incident where the bird flew in over the fence and dropped a fish,” John Auville chimed.

“Yea, I’m afraid of fish and birds,” Span confessed.

“Fish, and birds and MRIs,” Bickel said. “I’m with you on the MRIs.”

“What’s so fearsome about birds?!” JP Flaim asked.

“I’m not an outdoorsman,” Span explained.

“Even though your job entails you being outdoors like half the year!” Auville zinged.

“You know, I’m okay with someone throwing a fastball at my head,” Span countered. “But a bird flies at my head, I’m more terrified.”

“So what happened with the fish?” Jason Bishop asked. “The bird just dropped the fish in front of you?”

“He dropped the fish right in front of centerfield right during batting practice,” Span recounted.

“But you grew up in Tampa!” Bishop clubbed.

“Yea, I know.”

“So what did you think the fish was going to do?” EB asked.

“I wasn’t afraid of the fish, I was afraid of the bird!” Span jumped.

Days after the Nationals reported to Spring Training, outfielders were shagging flies when a large bird swooped down over them and dropped a fish onto the field.

This really happened.

But in all fairness to Denard, it wasn’t clear exactly how big the bird was. Maybe it had a menacing wingspan.

And just so you don’t lose all respect for Denard Span as a fearless warrior, he did clear up he’ll still order fish at a restaurant.

Just so long as it’s dead.

So the next time you’re scanning Nats Park and see Denard Span hidden in the shadows of the dugout, staring into nothingness, just think: ‘There’s a man who’s terrified to play the Marlins next week.’

No one knows your troubles, Denard.

Hear Span unburden himself below…

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